Having seen the New Year in with style – or certainly with copious bottles of fizz, lots of food, good friends and a fabulous firework spectacle, reality now kicks in.
Good news is that my sense of taste has returned and coffee is back on the menu as a thing of joy…however, other things that were on the horizon to be done, now need to move into the foreground. Most notably, stamina. That hasn’t exactly featured in my kick-start to the year, having struggled to get out of bed much before lunchtime this week….BUT I am up earlier today, have done a little walking each day and plan to get back in the swimming pool today as well. I suppose it doesn’t matter how long (or short!) the day is, so long as I am progressing. Not sure quite how this works if I am exercising more and regaining some brain function yet need even more sleep to counterbalance the activity…Maybe it just is as it is and may just take time…more time…more waiting…just my bag!
Would like to steam ahead with writing this novel I have had in embryo for considerably longer than anything else I have ever heard of, takes to gestate. Thinking about it and actually getting cracking seems impossibly difficult but I am determined to make a start within the coming week or at least, before I can formulate a new set of excuses of why I can’t…
Some brain wave activity is now replacing my “wading through chemo fug” which has not been an entirely positive experience. I am now seeing the reality of what I have to face this year. Will the treatment work or not? Even if it does work, (and what does “work” mean?) I think the baseline truth is that it is only buying me more time before the cancer progresses. However positively or negatively you look at this, it casts a sobering shadow over the year and what I might want to do sooner rather than later with whatever brain capacity and energy I can muster.
Many things spring to mind but the most obvious are that there’s plenty of shopping yet to be done (of every kind!) and of course the pile of books I want to read never gets any smaller….