Since I last attended the Dermatology Department a few weeks ago – the wild and rampant rash on my right arm has disappeared. This has been replaced by a hive of activity on my left arm which resembles (to my unprofessional eye) leprosy (my experience of leprosy informed by Ben-Hur…and I have seen it many times, so I should know!) and the surface of Mars interspersed with weeping pustules. Not a good look, I know, but can be hidden by carefully appointed sleeves…
When I had to raise my sleeve to consultant 1 there was a long silence as she returned to the computer to check the results of the previous biopsy. Lots of touchy-feely stuff and a puzzled face. It appears it could be one of many things but having the whole gamut of possibilities in one place is most unusual….(I am the stone, scissors AND paper of dermatology) Could it be fungal? bacterial? viral? or indeed a drug reaction? In came consultant 2 who was similarly astounded…but she took tests from a couple of pustules and scraped my skin into a test pot and scratched her head…OK…over to medical photography and then on to consultant 3 for a biopsy…Who knew a morning could be so much fun!
Think I have, as a result, now become the Department pet and there may now be a bit of competition around as to who can treat me the best….
The upside of all this was that whilst having the “procedure” (I am still rather true to my roots, if it is not too un-PC to say, of wondering why we can’t call a spade a bloomin’ spade!) Anyway….whilst having a piece of my leper colony flesh cut from my arm, the Portuguese nurse who was assisting, told us all about the difference in wines from northern and southern Portugal. She spoke of the delicious easy drinking wines (white and red) from Alentejo and the stronger more robust wines (for drinking with red meat) from the Douro. I am sure I would have got far more detail and specific recommendations had the “procedure” not finished and it was time for the next patient!
I love learning something new every day!