Monthly Archives: July 2016

Life can only be understood backwards

A year passes…

A year since I became a divorced woman

A year since I moved into my own home

…and what a year…

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Kicked into the long grass doing my “stuff”

Another decision making hiatus, another step forward, and, as a bonus, another new word. I am a “neophyte” that is. if I have understood the word correctly – converting to my own lay medical approach of dealing with metastatic cancer. I have stopped treatment.

Life is short and I am going to go my own way (not sure why this is all starting to sound a bit Fleetwood Mac) through it and quit being medicalised. I have reached a point, at last, when I feel my judgement is sound and I am not being controlled. I no longer want to be a slave to the hospital, all its sub-text and endless testing (not forgetting the permanent incumbent worry). I have decided to consider myself “better” and plan to “live” accordingly.

  • Yes…I have thought about it…(fancy…)
  • Yes…I know what I am doing
  • Yes…I have discussed with my oncologist
  • Yes…I have discussed with my family
  • and no…I don’t need further advice

I have now got the hang of this going solo lark. I make my own choices based on what I consider to be important. Finally I am finding out what I do consider to be important; what makes me happy and what catalysts make me spiral downwards. So…that’s the plan.